Well, week 1 is over. And I feel like I procrastinated it away, watching Glee and trying to pretend that I was busy, all the while letting go of the stress of the summer. Normally, I would be a little disappointed with myself for that, but honestly, I can’t help but think that it was for the better. At the start of another week, I feel great. The house is cleaner than it’s been in months. I’m sitting down at the office, working through the second chapter of one of my books, actually giving a crap about learning the material in advance of the class tomorrow. These are great steps towards being a more responsible person!
On the down side, I think I’m terrified of doing research. Which is going to make it Really hard to finish my thesis this term. So that’s the next thing to tackle in life. Everytime I think of working on my research, I fill with dread. I feel like I’m stuck, spinning my wheels in the mud. This isn’t at all fair, as I’ve got a few really good next steps that are just waiting to be implemented. But I haven’t made significant progress in so long, I can’t help but feel stuck.
So, this week, I’m going to implement all of the things that my advisor and I discussed last week and stop procrastinating. I’m going to just take the leap. Stop being scared of my own work. Stop feeling sorry for myself and avoiding it, and just dig the fuck in.
Ambiguous overarching goal, MADE. Results: Still to come…
